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Calvin and Hobbes (movie transcript)
Prologue The movie starts by showing a prairie on a rainy day, where then it focuses on a worm hole. Some worms start to come out, and they start talking. Worm 1: Ya know, it's starting to get kinda boring here being a worm. Worm 2: I'll say! Worm 3: I wish we were humans. Worm 2: Yeah, just think about what it would be like to be a human again. ???: Then I can help. Worm 4: Who's that? ???: Don't worry about that. You want to be humans, don't you? Worm 4: Uh, yeah... ???: You can also help me with a plan to destroy the ones who turned you into worms. Whatdaya say? Worms: YEAH! ???: Alright. I will also give you all of my hi-tech stuff. A beam of light approaches the worms, turning them back to dupes of Calvin again. Dupe 5: YES! Dupe 2: WE'RE BACK! Dupe 6: Now it's time for revenge... The logo appears. Commercial break for people watching on TV. Scene 1: Calvin's House Calvin: Hobbes, I've come to the feeling that you aren't real. Hobbes: WHAT? Why would you say that? Calvin: Susie only says 'Hi Calvin' and not your name, and most kids at school like Tommy Chestnut used air quotes over 'Hobbes', and they don't even say 'Hobbes'. They say 'your tiger'. They can't even remember your own name. Hobbes: Okay, admit it. I don't exist. But I know someone who can make everything real (excluding this movie). Calvin: REALLY? WHO? Hobbes: He's a magical tiger. He can do anything with his magical powers. Calvin: Well, let's go there RIGHT NOW! Hobbes: Alright, alright, alright! Suddenly, there is a pink cloud, and the magical tiger appears. Magic Tiger: Did someone call me? Calvin: Woah! We didn't have to go ANYWHERE! Magic Tiger: Yes. What do you need? Calvin: I want to make Hobbes real. Magic Tiger: Uh-oh. I'm out of elixir. Magic Tiger drops to the floor. Magic Tiger: Ow... Hobbes: That's your secret? Elixir? Magic Tiger: Of COURSE that's the secret! It's not like you can just GO to the market and buy my elixir. Hobbes: So, where do we get this elixir? Magic Tiger: Well, if ya want to get it yourself, you have to climb up the biggest hill in the city. Oh, yes, and go get it before that guy with a hood over his face. See ya! Calvin: Guy with a hood over his face?!? Calvin notices a camera behind the tiger's back. The camera backs away swiftly, leading to the Dupes. Dupe 4: I can't believe they didn't see that camera 'till the end of their little conversation! Dupe 3: So we should climb up the biggest hill in the city? ???: Exactly. Now go. Scene 2: The mountain Calvin: Ugh... Are we there yet? Hobbes: Remember, it's like when you have to get up the mountain to go back down using the wagon. Calvin: So that's why you brought the wagon? Hobbes: Yep. Calvin's Mom: Calvin, where are you going? Calvin: The biggest mountain in the city, why? Calvin's Dad: We're going there too. Calvin: Are you kidding? You didn't tell me! (cuts to when they get to the top) Calvin: Are we there yet? Calvin's Dad: No. Calvin: Are we there yet? Calvin's Dad: No. Calvin: Are we there yet? Calvin's Dad: No. Calvin: Are we there yet? Calvin's Dad: No. Calvin: Are we there yet? Calvin's Dad: N- Hobbes: YES! LOOK! THE POTION! (The dupes come across the other side.) ???: GET THAT POTION NOW! Dupes: YES SIR! (They do so.) Calvin: NO! Calvin's Mom: Calvin, no need to shout. Why are you shouting anyway? Calvin's Dad: We're only going up the biggest Moutain becuase you suddenly want to build character. Am I right? Calvin: NO! A guy wants to grab a potion from- Calvin's Dad: Oh. Well, Have fun. (walks away) ???: I must take your tiger friend away. GET THE TIGER! (the dupes do so) ???: And if you escape, I'll start to shoot. Alright? Hobbes: Yes sir. Scene 3: The money Calvin: Sigh... what do I do without Hobbes? (He eyes a picture hanging from his wall where he noticed part of it looks unfamiliar. He touches it, and a secret passage opens.) Calvin: Wow! I don't belive this! (Hobbes comes in the door.) Hobbes: Hey! I run away when he wasn't looki- OH MY GOSH. Calvin: There's several crates here! Come down and take a look! Hobbes: What's in 'em? Calvin: Dunno, there's gotta be a handle somewhere. (Hobbes rips the crates open, revealing it to be...) Both: MONEY! Calvin's Dad: *walks in* DID I JUST HEAR MONEY? Calvin: We are going to be rich. Magic Tiger: You do realize we have to use that for the quest, right? All(Except Magic Tiger): WHAT? Calvin's Dad: So we just got this to build charecther, Eh? Calvin: Oh jeez. Thanks dad. Calvin's Mom: *walks in* I thought I heard screaming, what's happening? Calvin's Dad: Come on, Gang, we're going outside to figure this out. Scene 4: Susie (Calvin finds Susie) Calvin: Hey Susie! Susie: Hey Calvin. Calvin: Hey want to help me on a quest? We have to find the potion for my tiger to be real... Susie: Of course not! You realize how your quests are stupid? I can't believe- Dupes: *flips Susie's skirt* Myaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! Susie: *covers skirt* That's it. I'm coming with you. Mr. Bun: Do I come too? Susie: I guess so. Calvin: NO! Hobbes: Why don't we go to the libary to figure this out? Calvin: Well, okay. Scene 5: The Library (they find a book on Chagrin Falls.) Calvin: Let's see... "One of the first houses in Ohio was 6653 Cherry Picker Road, where it was built in 1886, home to one of the three most deadliest murders in the 70's named Robert Anderson. However, he was caught and the house was sold to someone else in 1988. (A different) Robert, the person who owned the house before so and so, had stolen what people had belived as the map to the last tomb in Egypt, which led to the richest king ever." Hobbes: I'm scared now! Calvin's Dad: That so silly. A tomb in Ohio? Hobbes: Keep going. Calvin: "Legends say that the tomb is buried under 209 S Wakegaun Street in Glenview, Illinois (our house). Then, in 2005, a man named Samuel Robinson, found the tomb underneath the house. He strangely died later. Legends say that the figure is known as the Fearsome King DarkKid Calvinalter Richardo the III, (aka Dark Clavin) son of Felopeus, God of the Underworld, Son of Richardo, God of Death, Son of Belchipeios, God of Darkness, Son of Lucifer, The God of evil." Mr. Bun: Hearing that makes me quiver! *shivers* Susie: Oh hush up! We're with who might be this 'Dark Calvin'. Mr. Bun: Why are we here again? Susie: I want to find out the secrets of the money. By the way, he told us we've join their side and now we stole the money! Mr. Bun: But why?!? Susie: REVENGE, THAT'S WHAT! Hobbes: Tell me more! Calvin: He would want revenge on those who lived near the house. He would take the girl who has the money and would kill the youngest kid living in the house. The only way to destroy his soul forever, is to get a special potion on the top of the Willis Tower in Chicago before he does. Magical Tiger: And that potion is what I want you to have. Calvin: Is it the only one? Magical Tiger: ...but I do have a couple emergancy ones. Actually, I have lots. Calvin: Great! Let's go and drink them! Scene 6: Magical Tiger's Lab (Calvin approaches the drinks and drinks them all. After he looks really full.) Magical Tiger: Wait a minute! You have to use this responsibly! When you drink all the potions, make sure you look at Hobbes or else-- (poof, a store selling spaceships appears.) Hobbes: Why did you wish for a store called 'Bob's Starships' instead of-- (he turns into a stuffed tiger before he finishes his sentence) Calvin: Hobbes?!?!! Oh no! (poof, Stupendous Man, Spiff, and Tracer Bullet appear out of nowhere) Spiff: Woah! It's good that there is a spaceship store right there, because our hero was transported in some random place in the universe by the mangy Zook king, and loses his spaceship with it! Magical Tiger: I'll get the reverse potion! That should help! (Magical Tiger took finds out that he's fresh out of them.) Magical Tiger: Oh no! That's the thing that Dark Calvin took! Calvin: Dude, just make another potion. Stupendous Man: So they stole your potions, eh? Well, Stupendous Man is here to SAVE THE DAY! (flies off) Magical Tiger: It took me YEARS TO MAKE! We have no choise but to kill Dark Calvin! (Sees the store that the created, and then he coughs up a dinosaur) Calvin: WOAH! But anyway, why don't we go into the ship department? Tracer Bullet: We have a case to solve... (Five people go in. The dinosaur stays outside, guarding stuffed Hobbes. TBC)